Have you even remembered when was the last time you really felt your true self? Your mind is somehow stuck in the well of past and the moment you come out of the well, instead of stepping on the ground you just fly to the future. You are not walking at all. So you pray to provide you with the happiness of the past but you know that it will be incompatible with your present. You feel proud of being an impostor or I shall say a daring person to do the worst thing which you now regret of such sins.
The flower which smell and looks so good and hard to reach, was a trap from a dangerous beast. Although the flower still remain a flower. You better be a filmmaker because you create thousands of imaginary stories , or fake stories which gives you no hope but cost very much. What stops you from doing what are meant for you? or you still have a doubt if you you are a product of “by-chance”.
It’s no more a “How or Why”, its not past anymore, you got responsibilities. You don’t whine for the things which you do not have. The whole purpose of your life is not to create a deep impact on someone else’s life, because if it was the case, you already got the ticket to heaven!
Your hard work and practices to get that flower had given you some serious talents, talent which makes you sick, talents which took away the purpose. No problem, work hard to undo!. Life is not a movie, you’re not James Bond.
You can’t hope for a better future if you keep on holding to the past, your future gonna be horrible if you ignore your present. Just live the way you were suppose to: seek forgiveness, gratitude, prayer, work, achieve something great, a good death and a good life again.